Calm before the storm

Calm before the storm

The calm of the ocean is never reason enough for me to let lose the sail and rest myself off guard. The feeling of impending danger always haunts me no matter what tidings the horizon brings. I have lived my life in uncertainty always. Whether it be tentative relief from all the trivialities of self created fears or a break in the downward spiral of life I can always find reasons to worry.

I don’t know what troubles my mind today. I don’t know why I have been feeling restless lately. I feel my soul is in turmoil. And I dare not think what is to follow. I made a wish yesterday and woke up early morning with a feeling of my wish being fulfilled. I fear what if my dream materializes…what if I am granted what I have almost begged for. What if life is to go no further? What if I can take it no longer?