why do i feel the way i do?

I feel the way I do because this is how I am. What makes me low today is externally triggered only to the extent to which my intrinsic sensitivity embraces it. My disillusionment is as much a consequence of naive idealism as exposure to bitter reality. My discontent arises from my expectations to an equal degree as this world's inability to provide what I yearn. My alienation towards the world I inhabit is an indication of both my resistance towards the external and others' limitations regarding an understanding of myself.

It is neither the self nor the other whom I can solely indict with my misery. The onus of my assumed anguish lands upon both my within and the external.

No matter how much I try to break away from the invisible chains of the norms that restrict me, I always feel more constrained. On the contrary not the will of this entire universe can release me from where I imprison myself (under the clouds of despair).